Yu Yu Hakusho Episode One: GENKAI HAS KIDS!
by Taerga Live
Summary: Doesn't the title say enough? Sigh Genkai's kids are comeing to visit. Warning:Lots of cursing. I own no one...this is the only time I'll say it.


Yu Yu Hakusho

Episode One: GENKAI HAS KIDS!

Written By: Taerga Live and her older brother, Rich

Just so you know, for some strange reason, the gang (Hiei, Yusuke, Kuwabara, Kurama, and Genkai) live in Genkai's temple. It just made things easier.

(Starts off with Genkai looking at the mail.)

Genkai: Let's see…bill, bill, bill, you just won some piece of shit, bill, you are most wanted, bill…what's this? (Looks at the return address) Oh my mother 'F'en (The F bomb) God. (Let's out a blood curling scream. Yusuke comes in the room when she stops. She shoots the letter with the spirit gun.)

Yusuke: Genkai, what the hell's wrong with you?

Genkai: Uh…whatever do you mean?

Yusuke: I think you broke the sound barrier. What's going on?

Genkai: Oh…I just got a letter from my stupid kids.

(Kuwabara randomly pops up)

Kuwabara: Wait a minute…you have kids?

Genkai: Sigh Yes, I have kids.

Kuwabara: How many?

Genkai: Four.

Kuwabara: Who's the father?

Genkai: That's none of your business. (I don't know who it is. You will never find out.)

Yusuke: So what was the letter about?

Kurama: What letter?

Genkai: Let's just get this over with…get Hiei out here as well so I don't have to repeat myself.

Hiei: I've been here the whole time.

Genkai: Okay then. My children are coming to visit.

Kurama: Well that's good.

Genkai: ARE YOU KIDDING! My children are brats.

Kuwabara: Really?

Genkai: YES!

Yusuke: O…kay, ya don't hafta yell.

Kurama: Well that was before…maybe they've changed.

Genkai: That's doubtful…they're coming tomorrow for dinner. (Sarcastically) Oh goody, goody gumdrops. Walks away

Yusuke: Something tells me that Genkai doesn't want her kids to come.

Hiei: Well, no shit Sherlock

Yusuke: I'm not Sherlock. I'm not British.

Hiei: (Muttering) You're not a man either.

Yusuke: I HEARD THAT!

Kurama: Sigh This is going to be a long episode…

Kuwabara: What are you talking about?

Kurama: Uh…Boop boop (That noise you hear when a blooper scene is done) This is going to be a long…two days.

We'll be right back, after this commercial break!

Koto: Are you tired of waking up with that dead body still on your floor? Well, we've got the solution for that problem. Introducing the one and only: Body Desenagrater! It comes in a spray bottle so it's easy to carry. All you have to do is spray it one the dead body and…(Poof) it's gone! The Body Desenagrater! Buy it today!

Koeama: Warning: It may take the Body Desenagrater three hours before the body disappears for good. The body doesn't really disappear; it ends up in your shower.

Now back to the show!

(The next day…)

Yusuke: Okay guys, when Genkai's kids get here, we have to be better than we really are so fake it. Hiei, no killing.

Hiei: Damn it!

Doorbell rings

Kurama: I'll get it. Opens door (Shows Four people in their mid 20's. Three of them are guys and the other is a girl.) You…must be Genkai's children.

Girl: Sadly, yes. We are. I am Nicole. This is my older brother, Markus; his twin, Rob; and our little brother, Shaza.

Shaza: Shaza!

Kurama: Blink, blink Well, come in then. Walk in the door

Markus: This place is still the same way we left it, a DUMP!

Shaza: Yeah, you'd think mom would be able to get a better place. Shaza!

Yusuke: What's wrong with it?

Nicole: Well, nothing's wrong with it…just now we all are used to…better places then this.

Rob: Indeed. Pushes glasses up

Kuwabara: What do ya mean?

Genkai walks in

Genkai: (Thinking) Oh great, they let them in. (Normally) Well hello.

Short hellos

Hiei: Can't you just sense the love here?

Kurama: Hiei, keep quiet.

Hiei: Fine I will.

Genkai: Let's just eat Everyone heads for the table (Mutters) before I have to kill one of you.

(While they were eating…)

Quietness

Yusuke: Breaking the silence So…what have you guys done with your mom lately?

Markus: Tried to put her in the Home.

Nicole: Tried to put her in the Home.

Rob: Tried to put her in the Home.

Shaza: Gave her money…Record Scratch …to bribe her to live in the Home. Shaza!

Genkai: Well, neither one of your attempts worked. I blew up the Home. HA!

Yusuke: But Genkai, there were people in there.

Genkai: …not anymore.

Kuwabara: Is it just me or does this food taste funny?

Yusuke: Yeah you're right…wait a minute. Kuwabara was…right? That's a first.

Kurama: Better put that in the baby book.

Both of them start laughing.

Yusuke: So…why do you guys hate each other so much?

Genkai: I told you, they're brats.

Nicole: Excuse me? **We **were brats? You were the worst mother of all time.

Genkai: Really?

Markus: Yeah, you treated us like dirt.

Yusuke: Hey, Genkai wouldn't do that. She only treats me like dirt.

Shaza: You're a fool, fool. Shaza!

Yusuke: Must you say your name after everything?

Shaza: Yeah. Shaza!

Genkai: How did I treat you like dirt?

Rob: You paid more attention to your students than us.

Markus: You never let us have any fun.

Shaza: You made me sleep in a garbage can. Shaza!

Nicole: The only thing I've ever played with was a doll…that was really a pine cone.

Genkai: First of all, my student's training was vicarious; I had to make sure they got home alive. Second of all, you guys were always up to no good so you were punished most of the time. That's why you guys never had fun. Third of all, you **wanted **to sleep in the garbage can remember?

Shaza: Oh yeah…Shaza!

Genkai: And Finally, I didn't have much money so I had to make do with what I had at hand…and in my hand was a 'F'en pine cone.

Everyone has shocked faces

Nicole: Mom, you never told us you didn't have that much money.

Genkai: That's because I didn't want to worry you guys…

(All of a sudden, X-nauts (From Paper Mario: the Thousand Year Door) Bust in)

:Sorry to interrupt your meal but…allow me to introduce myself. I…am Lord Crump! Leader of the X-naut army!

X-nauts: All hail Lord Grodus, the overlord. And Hail Lord Crump, our leader!

Crump: We've come to defeat the winners of the Dark Tournament, which would be you freaks.

Yusuke: Why?

Crump: Lord Grodus wants no interference with his plans to rule the world. X-nauts!

X-nauts charge at them

Genkai: Looking at her kids I know you guys always hated fighting (That explains why she was looking for someone to train) but, how about we show them what we can do…for old time's sake?

Kids: Okay! (Shaza: Shaza!)

Long story short, they kick Lord Crump's ass

Crump: We will meet again! Runs off with his army

Genkai and her kids look at each other

Nicole: Well, we must admit, we were brats back when we were little.

Genkai: And I admit I was a plain old jackass.

Yusuke: Aww…come on guys, hug each other.

Genkai and Kids: Don't push it! Laugh

The end

During the credits…

Kuwabara: I don't feel so good.

Yusuke: I know…something in that food tasted nasty.

Kurama: Hiei, you haven't said anything all day…or eaten.

Hiei: That's because there was dish soap in the food.

Others: WHAT!

Kurama: Why didn't you say anything?

Hiei: Because and I quote "Hiei, keep quiet." Losers. Laughs

Scene for the next episode:

Hiei: Look, how do I get out of this stupid game?

Yusuke: You have to lose all your money and properties.

Hiei: How about this? You take all my money Hands it to Yusuke you take all my properties hands it to Kurama look at that! I'm bankrupt. Later. Starts to walk away Hey what's this? Looks at a card he had. Smirks I'll…be right back.

All that and more on the next Episode of Yu Yu Hakusho: You Wrote Books!


End file.
